It’s been a crazy week for me.

I’m not sure if I want to post this here or not. I posted a little about on my private blog but I think I should share what happened and what will be happening in the next few months.

Where do I start? This is really hard for me and I break down in tears if I think about it too much. On Wednesday morning at 12:14am, J walked into the tv room and saw me having a…… Seizure… An episode? An incident? I’m not sure. It’s hard to talk about it. I don’t know if it was my fault because of the pills I took that night or if there is something wrong with my body.

My right leg was banging on the glass table and then like 10 bottles of nail polish feel over and all that banging glass noise made J come in there. He saw me…. Convulsing. Called 911 and they took me away. They released me about 7 hours later. Saying nothing is showing up on their tests but I should get an EEG. I went to the doctor at my clinic about my shoulder and they took X-rays and said nothing is wrong. I STILL FEEL LIKE SO ETHING IS WRONG. it feels like that the tendons or something aren’t properly attached. Then went to the neurologist and who wants an MRI on Monday. EEG is December 15th. Neurologist is December 20th and my appointment with my primary care is December 16?????

This is all really scary to me. I don’t know if it’ll happen again. I don’t know if I’ll ever be sociable again or if I, going to go back to the life of sleeping in or having a mostly pain free life. I would say I was a 6 on good days. Maybe a 5. And really great dates it was like a 2. Buuuuuut the most stresses cause a 10.

I’m scared another “episode” will happen again.

I’m so happy and proud of J and how he was during the whole thing. It definitely made me proud the we took charge through our emergency. I look at him and I just want to cry a little for him. I think he’s too good or not young enough to deal with me and my health problems of 2014.

I better go. I have an MRI appointment at 945.

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